Dryxanne’s Confessions

You over there.

If you read this, I just want to say…

You have changed. Or you have tried hard to change.

It’s not that I don’t appreciate your changes. But I have to be honest, some of your changes surprises me. I’m overwhelmed.

Left speechless.

I remember that most of our quarrels were over things that you couldn’t do just because "It’s so not me..!!". And we would end up angry at each other, me with my high expectations, you with your anger and confusions of why I couldn’t accept you the way you are.

Somehow, at one point, I felt that I wanted to stop calling you My Devil. For bad reason, because I wanted to quit on trying to work things out. Because I felt tired, too tired, working on something that seemed useless. Because I learned in a bitter way, that the name made you felt that I saw you as a bad person that could do nothing but to break my heart.

That is so not true…

I called you My Devil because you are like a sweet temptation to me. Keep on seducing me to come join you in flames of fire. Because in your devilish way, you showed your angelic side. Because you know, devils could repent. But to imagine an angel falling to dark side, that is so much against my subconscious mind to think that angels were made perfectly pure, sinless.

Feeling kinda lost of what I’m talking about? Me too.

Then, there was a time when I really stopped calling you My Devil. If you noticed, it’s been quite some time I haven’t written anything about you, or us. Because I was trying to settle what to write, but there were just too many sweet things happened lately. And you did all that.

So, I just want to say, before I forgot all these things…

Thank you for making me smile again.

Thank you for teasing me until I became angry just to surprise me the next day with your surprise arrival.

Thank you for understanding all my doubts and objections, even if it meant you had to sacrifice some things for your personal joy and put mine on better priorities.

Thank you for being silent when I needed it, for not asking a single question when I couldn’t answer any of it.

Thank you for willingly using the pet name you rejected long time ago.

Thank you for everything you do, you’ve brighten up my day…

Nguk

Grauk grauk…